There is a delicate balance between being the attractive cocky funny guy and the chubby funster. You don’t want to be that fat guy who everyone laughs at; even if you are genuinely funny the humour will often be self deprecating. If you can make a women laugh then you are onto a good thing. It means they are enjoying their time in your presence and will likely want to see you again.
There are right and wrong ways to make women laugh. Be aware that women have a different sense of humour than men so the jokes that you think work with your mates wont pass with women. Obviously toilet humour and sexually related jokes won’t work well with women but there are other ways to go about making women laugh.
Use Misrepresentations When Flirtin
Misrepresentations: This means you intentionally mistake the /hobby/appearance/clothing of a women for something else. In fact you can choose any aspect or situation and creatively misrepresent it in a funny way. This re framing takes a bit of wit as you have to come up with it on the spot. Misrepresenting what a women says is perhaps the easiest and most common.
The reason for this is not only humour but also bonding. You can create a separate world that you and her can return to regarding this funny misrepresentation. Don’t use any overly negative reframes as they come across as blatant disrespect. But come up with a great misrepresentation of her looks or status that makes her laugh and you can great a bond that she will remember for a long time.
Focus 80% of your energy and your attitude, positivity and smile and 20% on what you say. By being confident and smiling you can increase your flirting success immensely. Too many guys are nervous and tense, even if they have funny and interesting things to say they make a women feel nervous. As a result she remembers the experience as negative because of how she felt at the time.
Getting good at asking probing questions will serve you well.
Instead of letting the conversation topic die off, reignite it with questions such as
- What do you men by that or what do you mean when you say that?
- What’s the story behind that?, whats the story behind that necklace, scar, clothing item
This sort of causal interrogation forces her to delve into her past and open up. She will be happy that you are genuinely interested in her life and her past. Flirting is not all about sexual motivations it can be actively listening and asking questions that allow your date to open up.
Sometimes you will be on a date or trying to pick up a women and she is completely stale. If you are not feeling any chemistry from her then you might need to trigger some romantic and emotion thoughts in her head to get her started. After all the goal of flirting is to trigger physical attraction and emotive feelings toward you.
Yes this does work – just remember how you felt when your friend described a gruesome operation or accident he witnessed.
The kinds of words we hear directly affects how we feel.
When you talk using emotive words a women must delve into her emotions and feel that emotion you are talking about in order to understand what you are talking about. When you talk about happiness love romance and lust with her she is thinking those thoughts while looking at you. She links up her desires with you face even though she does not know she is doing it.
“I can only imagine how happy and beautiful you must feel when you dance”
“It must make you feel very special when you hear such great things about your work”
It should be no surprise to you why women love romantic novels, … this is what they want to hear from men! (occasionally)
Skim some chapters of romantic novels to get an idea.
You Don’t Need Permission To Be Confident
Most guys, for whatever reason, need to see signs from women that their flirting is ok before they feel confident enough to do it properly.
By this time it’s way too late. Women are checking you out and in the first 10 seconds they will know if you’re scared of her or not. You don’t need permission from women to be have confidence and be the man that it takes to flirt successfully.
Decide yourself that you have what it takes and use fun relaxed flirty behaviour to pick up women.